Friday, October 12, 2012

Hulk Never Learns.

Oops, I did it again: I HULKED through a workout.

Despite prompts from my body, I refuse to leave the room at Bikram last night, pushing myself - without water - right into a migraine.

You're told to hydrate all day, ditching the water at least a half-hour before your Bikram class. You are absolutely allowed to bring a water bottle to class, but only sips are recommended. So I don't typically bring one.

And talk about a guilt trip: The Bikram instructor makes sure to repeat during his 90-minute dialogue: "Take a knee if you have to, just stay in the room."

On this night, I felt off. Not just fatigued from the heat and intense workout, but something else. I am dizzy and DREAMING of water, fantasizing like a million times that I'm running out the door to guzzle a bottle of the cold stuff.

But then, the instructor says, to a gal obviously struggling as bad as I am, "Yoga [and he really should have said 'Bikram Yoga'] is about doing what you can, with what you have."

So, rather than listening to my body, I choose to practice what I think is "self control," and fight, strain - even cry through 60 more, hellish minutes of asanas.

I leave Bikram staggering, and near-blind with a migraine. After guzzling water, I think to myself, Good for me for sticking with it, and controlling my craving for water.

I rationalize that I can now control any craving - snacks after work, too many drinks at the party.

But later, Chris so subtly calls me out on this ridiculousness. I ask him if I made the right choice when I picked the "self control" lesson over listening to my body, and he says:

"Well, it took you till 12:30 tonight to recover from a migraine..."

Point taken. I should have listened to my body.

"I was just like, 'You can do one more pose. Then one more pose. Just suffer through it.'"

"That's you, baby," he says. "'Suffer through. Suffer through.'"

Once again, I am reminded of my resurfacing lesson that, Wow, I DON'T NEED TO SUFFER! I don't need to tough it out! Will this damned "Hulk" quality ever leave me?

"It's an enviable trait," Chris reassures me, leading my brain to finish the thought with, "...but there's a time and a place to use it, and it's not in a 110-degree room when your body is begging for water, and the nausea is 2 seconds away from forcing you belly-up in a faint."

After the rough sweat sesh, I needed to relax. So I drew a bath and peppered in my "Muscle Relaxation" mix: Epsom salt, and drops of lavender and rosemary essential oil. Add a candle and "The Shins" channel on Pandora, and I sunk right into a true savasana.

...A nice little reminder that there is, in fact, an alternative to suffering.

Sometimes you need to choose peace over push.

No comments:

Post a Comment