Friday, August 10, 2012

Hulk Not Fractured, but a Little Broken.

Johnny Cash and I are on the same page today:
I hurt myself.

So, you know this "hulk" nickname my love gave me? Well, sometimes that ambition goes a little too far. This time, for sure. I've been doing CrossFit for two weeks, and got really ambitious with one of the workouts. It was 40 box jumps, and I aimed to do them on a higher-than-normal box for me.About 20 in, I was struggling and got super tired. Then, as I hopped high for my 21st, my foot slipped and my shin came crashing then grinding down, on the edge of the box.Searing pain made my leg instantly weak, but we were in the middle of the group workout and I didn't want to look like a wimp. So I tried another box jump. I missed it, so I got a smaller box. I finished out the workout. And the extra exercises. It was weird - I must have had some mad adrenaline because I kept going, ignoring my leg. Yet, I felt tears well up in my eyes at least three times. But I never stopped.The shin cut/bruise became my life after my man and I left that workout. He was talking to me about the house we are buying, and all I could think of was my leg. My leg. Is it okay? Am I going to injure it by walking on it? Am I bleeding out internally? Why do I feel trapped in this vortex of pain?We ran several errands, all the while my love was telling me I should go to the doctor to get it checked out. In my mind, doctors equal money, so I kept brushing it off. Plus, I didn't think I could have possibly hurt myself that badly. I mean, I just fell during a workout!My mister left for work, leaving me sprawled on the couch with my leg propped up for about an hour. It hurt so bad, and so deep down. But I thought, "this isn't too bad. I can handle it." Getting thirsty, I got up and limped to the kitchen and back, and right before I hit the couch, a primeval pain started from the core of my shin bone and shocked outward, resonated it's awful wrath around my wound. I screamed out and collapsed on the couch, howling for at least an hour. I thought my neighbors would for sure be knocking on my door any moment now.

My man smartly advised me to go to the emergency care center. I couldn't find anyone to take me, so I drove myself (stupid!). Thank God it was the other leg that needed to work the clutch!

Disheveled and exhausted from the pain, I sat in the waiting room alone, then through an x-ray, then through the nerve-jolting prodding of my leg.

No fracture, doc said, but bone is bruised, which takes just as long to heal. She recommended crutches so I stay off that leg as much as possible. She also through in some pain meds.

After the pharmacy, I got home and crashed. I started wallowing in self-pity, letting every other stress in my life surface. Hey, if you're going to cry, might as well get it all out at once, right? 

On Facebook, an interesting comment came up from my old professor: "I'm sorry it took this to get you to slow down!"

Am I really that hard on myself? I didn't think so, but now, I'm not so sure. 
Maybe I could use a slower pace every now and again. 
There's just so much I want to do, and I get bored so easily.
But I need to relax and let things happen sometimes. Relinquish control.

There's also a lesson in how I hurt myself in the first place. If I hadn't have felt the need to go Hulk, I wouldn't have injured myself so badly. Maybe in life, too much future-sight makes you lose focus on what you're doing now, perhaps causing you to make mistakes that could put you behind in the long run. Maybe.

Ending on a lighter note: I took the next day off from work to recover. My darling and I had no food in the house so he whisked me into the car and off to the grocery store. But when we got there, he wouldn't let me get out of the car just yet. He said he'd be right back. I saw him walk across the parking lot, right up to a little old lady, who in turn, started giving him pointers on her transportation device. Before you know it, my love is heading my way on a motorized grocery cart.

"Your chariot, my dear!" He says.

That was a whole OTHER lesson in pride. Wow. What a day. Here's to ending it with a blog, and a pain pill. Cheers!

**PS: Everyone recommended R.I.C.E. for my injury. They said Rest, Ice, Compression and Elevate can cure most of anything.

1 comment:

  1. Now I'm mad at you. I would have taken you to the ER!!!

    Oh, and next time you decide to hurt yourself, please check with me first so I can coordinate those days off work, too.

    P.S. I dig the blog big time.